Bad day? Vent with haiku.

When I used to work in an office with cool coworkers, I was in a punchy mood one night and started writing haiku* based on real customer emails.

I am quite upset
At your stupid, sucky, lame
Mickey Mouse product.

Email 1:
Template doesn’t work!
You guys are crooks! I hate you!
Refund my money!

Email 2:
I was just joking.
Ignore my former email.
I figured it out.

On especially bad days when dealing with rude customers, my coworkers and I would instant message each other with “haiku that we would like to send over email.”

Valued customer:
We regret to inform you
That you are stupid.

If I said bad words
I would say a lot of them
To this stupid man!

I found that this was a very safe way to vent frustration and keep a decent demeanor with customers and coworkers alike.

A friendly warning –
Haiku can be addictive,

You may begin to
think, read, and speak in groups of
five, seven, and five.

* Haiku (the same word is used to refer to either singular or plural) is usually a short poem of three lines. The first and last lines have 5 syllables and the middle line has 7.


17 thoughts on “Bad day? Vent with haiku.

  1. None of these poems
    mention nature or season
    like “proper” haiku;

    given the subject,
    the elders should relax their
    stance on this topic.

    Reading your haiku
    with a mock southern accent
    makes them funnier.

  2. lol lol lol lol lol
    Laughing releases anger
    lol internet lol;

    counting syllables,
    clearly not my forte, eh?
    (tanka are easier)

    oh, I almost didn’t
    remember to mention:
    Found this via Dave, too.

  3. ” β€œDear WaterLearner,
    Melanie, and Adam Kayce –
    So pleased you dropped by!”

    I can not believe
    You got that comment to fit β€”
    It’s amazing, no? ”

    Friday once again!
    WaterLearner strikes Haiku.
    Fun Fun Everyone!

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